Sometimes we have a problem saying or do something because we are afraid of what people think about us. Or, even worse, what people would tell.
Let’s look at this situation from a different perspective. You are in a bad situation, whatever that situation is. You want to go away, to quit, to move…but, what to tell people? What friends and family will think? Maybe a neighbor from the house across the street will look at you disappointed? Or colleagues will talk behind your back?
It’s about time to learn that what people think about you is not your problem!
Do you think that everyone should and will love you? We all want to be liked and appreciated for our many talents, our brutal intelligence, our good nature, our sparkling personality. The truth is that there always will be someone who won’t like you. And that’s ok. It’s impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations, so don’t burn yourself out trying to do so. It’s about time to learn that what people think about you is not your problem!
When we care what others think, we give them huge power. We put them in the first place, instead of ourselves. And that is the wrong way if you want to make some positive changes in your life. When we give over our power to others, we lose out on who we are. The only reality we can see is how we believe others see us.
One important thing you should remember is that most people aren’t paying much attention. People spend more time thinking about themselves than thinking about others. If they’re expressing an opinion about your life, it’s probably not something they’ve given much thought to but just a passing thought.
The other important stuff is that happy and successful people won’t be judgmental. For important decisions, you may want to seek out a few opinions from people you trust–and then forget the rest. Pick people who know how to give feedback that’s constructive and specific.
Here is the checklist for a happier life:
- How energy I invest in other people’s opinion about myself on a scale from 1 to 10?
- How much other people’s opinion about me changed my opinion about myself?
- Is that useful for me on a scale from 1 to 10?
I want you to think about the energy you wasted on unimportant people and to focus on YOU. Be gentle to yourself and respect your personality. Change the things you don’t like and be true to yourself. No one is in your shoes. You know what is best for you. People will love you, people will hate you, and none of it will have anything to do with you. Make your choices and live by those decisions, taking full responsibility for what you do and how you do it. When you do, you’ll gain the self-esteem you need and the award (or lesson) for your choices.